Sólo tengo una sonrisa y espero una de vuelta:.

I don't have all the answers (nor I expect to ever have them!) for living in peace as a couple, but if there's anything I'm certain of, is that only you can make you happy, and that you can't expect your significant other to solve those insecurities that have (probably?) haunt you since the beginnings of time....

I'm a believer, in the sense that you can only truly share your thoughts with someone who isn't always on the lookout for life-changing experiences from external stimuli. In brief, (even if it sounds cruel) I'm not gonna try to fix you, but only because I think you're better than that (and if you're not, well...that's OK =)).

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't care about titles, descriptions or anything else; I only care about you (right now) and what I feel when I look in your eyes. I cannot promise I'll feel this way forever, but I'd like to ask you...does it even matter?:.

Yo confío en el destino y en la marejada,
yo no creo en la iglesia,
pero creo en tu mirada.

Computer love:.

If there's any question worth asking ourselves is: what's the meaning of life?, and I might also add: is what I'm doing now helping me get where I want?. Sadly, there's no way of knowing for sure =):.

I've been thinking about this because someone important to me casually asked about the things that make me happy, and, as usual, I answered that nothing but freedom will ever make me happy...and though that's true, I'd like to delve on this topic a little bit more.

I've previously experienced moments when I've transcended myself, I've also experienced pleasure with somebody else...heck, I've also experienced joy and happiness while killing some other guys!. But as someone wiser might say, only you can make you happy and to do that, you must learn to trust yourself!!:.

This might seem obvious to you, but the sad truth is that most of the people I know (and even myself) don't always live up to those goals. Maybe the advice shouldn't come from someone wiser, maybe we need to hear it from someone just as slob as us...Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody is gonna die. Come watch tv...

I don't know what to do,
I need a rendez-vous.

I think I saw what happens next:.

Of all the bad things with the academic world, waiting for a conference paper notification is definitely in my top three. Let me explain.

The basic idea is that you find a conference where you would like to publish your work, then follow their paper guidelines and submit according to their strict deadlines. After a couple of months you receive a notification telling you whether your work was accepted or not, and some comments from the reviewers. 

The problem is that conferences' chairs don't seem to have the same consideration for your time as they do for theirs. I think it's insulting that they can keep you waiting all day for a notification that never comes, and then two days later either tell you that their reviewers are swamped and that the notification will come at some point in the future, or that they simply forgot to click on the button that submits the notifications. Even worse, you may never receive a notification at all...

They have all the right to accept/reject your paper, but I think it's only fair if they tell you why they did it. You might expect this from shady events, but I've experienced it with A rank conferences, which makes you think if the academic community even takes itself seriously or not. 

Maybe it's like in that episode from The Office, where a sadistic candidate explains that he likes to keep people waiting for an answer, because of the slight hopefulness in their voice, the pregnant pause while they wait to hear the response...and then the response. 

I don't know, I just wanted to rant about this because I'm still waiting for a notification that was due yesterday...

And after this,
can it last another night?
After all the bad advice
had nothing at all to do with life.

And I wonder:.

Do you remember that great song from Jarabe de Palo where he says that there are two days in his life for which he was not born?. Well, today I'd like to argue that it is way better to focus on those days when you realize that life is worth living!.

For me, several of these days took place during my last stay in Mexico, when I had the chance to meet a real human being. We shared really good [and to be honest, not so good =)] times together, doing things we both love, such as travelling, listening to good music, watching the sunrise, getting lost, and so many little things that really need someone special to notice and care about...

To be honest, I can't remember the last time I felt so hopeful about life in general, and it feels so good!. I also feel more mature (though that's really not for me to say), compared to previous relations and degrees of connection with other people in my life. And you know what?, unlike other times, I'm not afraid or insecure, I just want to make things right, and share experiences with someone important in my life.

I know that just because someone likes the same crap you do doesn't mean she's your soulmate, but I also know that it is extremely rare to find someone compatible with you. I do not know what the future holds, but for the first time in a long time, I just feel the same way I tell people to feel when they ask me for advice, really calm =):.

Thanks for sharing your time with me, I'll try to make it worth your while!!:.

If everything could ever feel this real forever,
if anything could ever be this good again.

A real human being:.

Do you remember that great song from Keane where they say that it's OK to be full of hope as you begin rearranging the pieces of the dreams that you have?. Well, I'd like to believe that I'm going through one of those phases now.

Let me explain. Some weeks ago I met someone with whom I have many things in common, and as you probably know, this is not something that happens often to me, but when it does, it's really interesting!. What I specially like is how we can talk about nothing and all, and still have those aha moments that make you feel that you're connecting with somebody else.

I don't know, but for sometime now I've come to look for stability in my life and people to share it with. Without imposing any particular role or anything, it's always good to meet someone who appreciates the little things, the way you do.

Let's all meet up five years from now and see where we stand, but at least for now, I'm having a pretty good time with you =).

Back against the wall and odds,
with the strength of a will and a cause.

Come and meet me tomorrow:.

After much thought, today I'd like to talk about female/male chauvinism, a very controversial topic in software engineering, and by doing so I know that I'm exposing myself to hate and ill will from radical internet groups, but I don't really care...

I'd like to start by saying that ever since I was little, I noticed that females receive different treatment from society, and I didn't think this treatment was fair at all. For example, as a kid there were times when I found myself troubled by some female children, and while trying to get back at them, I was told by grown-ups that I couldn't fight back, just because my opponents were girls!!. Apparently, they deserved some special treatment just because of their sex, but I didn't really understand. My thinking was: if they can attack, they surely can defend. But other people (both boys and girls) seem to have this differentiated treatments seared by fire. And this is just a little example of the differentiated treatments that you are taught while growing up. It may seem trivial, but the problem is that by accepting these special treatments, you are denying to consider all people as equal...

Of course, this has brought me problems, but I'd like to argue that I just try not to make special considerations for anybody!.

I believe that, at least in my culture, this is due to flaws in the way we are currently raised. For the most part, in our junior years we are taught to expect/receive special treatments, and then we grow up and expect to keep them while continuously asking for more benefits. I've previously discussed some of these things, like they way you're expected to greet somebody, but it's funny that a couple of weeks ago I had a similar conversation (with people from disparate corners of the world) regarding things such as buying things in a market and flirting. We talked about how there are certain protocols that we expect and accept as the natural order of things (usually due to our sex) and it's interesting that you only notice them when you get out of your natural context, for example, when you interact with other cultures.

And I don't pretend to be innocent here. During these conversations I also found myself repeating some male chauvinist ideas that I'm not really proud of. There's definitely much to be done, but by reflecting on these topics, and by trying to change my own behaviour, I like to think that I'm doing my best to help improve this world for those who will come after I leave =):.

I know we've got nothing in common now,
Just our shared love of drinking.

All things go:.

Exactly two years ago I was packing to come live in France, so today it feels like a good time for me to stop for a little while and reflect on all the things that I've had the chance to experience last year in this strange land.

To be honest, I passed through dark times, and I even questioned my purpose in life and whether or not I should continue pursuing my current objectives. Maybe it was because I was close to my 30th anniversary (a key milestone in anyone's life), me getting in contact with altered states of mind, or perhaps just plain depression, but what matters the most is that in the end I decided to continue, both because I like what I do (and the freedom it gives me!), and because of the people I have the chance to meet and work with.

Anyway, just as last year, the most important part of this year was interacting with (and learning from) people from all around the world. And that's huge for me, because many years ago I didn't think that would be possible, but luckily for me, time has proved me wrong!. 

And you know what?,  it's funny that I'm not the only one saying goodbye to an era!. A lot of my favourite TV series decided to say goodbye this year, particularly, Breaking Bad, Futurama, The IT Crowd and The Office. Maybe I should just take this as a sign and start moving forward from the virtual to the real world...well, just maybe, but that will definitely be the topic of another post =):.

It was for freedom,
from myself and from the land.